It’s not necessarily that I want to “die”…or want to be dead.
It’s just thtat I don’t understand why it is that I am here.
It may, and will forever, be baby girl that has attached me to this world.
I would have lifted off without her.
I am able to recognize that I am existing very deep inside of a depression at this present moment.
I keep kicking myself that at the idea that it’s because I miss my mom so much.
It’s just that, that wasn’t how it was all supposed to go down.
I would have understood the point of my existence had restoration been fully made.
It makes no sense to deliver…and then un deliver.
I haven’t eaten today.
But, then again, I just now smoked a bowl.